Life will be better when…

It is Monday and I am so excited it is Monday. After a week of being sick and a long but amazing weekend of yoga teacher training, I am ready for my normal routine. I have been thinking about Monday all week, I could not wait to get here. Why have I been so excited about it? Because it is a lot easier to look at where we are going and think it is going to be better than where we are at now.

However, constantly looking forward without ever being present is a poor way to live life because tomorrow, next week, next month, or next year are not guaranteed. It feels simple to say and sometimes it feels cheesy but it is the truth. I know I like to think tomorrow is certain and the future is certain but it is not. When we live for tomorrow we forget how important it is to live right now. 

It is important to have things to look forward to and it is important to have goals. But there is something to be said for waiting for you life to be better. Life does not get better by becoming more things or gaining more things. Living a better life comes from small disciplines every day that help to make us happier, kinder and gentler people. 

“My life will be better when…” is the biggest bullshit story we can tell ourselves. It is harmful to believe it. I spent a long time telling myself my life will be better when I get older, I have a career, I am married and have a family. It is bullshit because all the years I spent telling myself and all the times I catch myself saying it now, I am missing the point of being human. I am missing the point of living for this very moment. Dreaming of someday takes away from being here right now. 

There were times in my life when that bullshit story was a form of comfort because I was going with something painful I did not want to sit with. But I learned we cannot escape pain by dreaming of something better. Pain demands to be felt and it will cycle back around to make sure we feel it and deal with it. It is only by dealing with pain and learning to be here now that we can stop the bullshit stories about the future. 

I still dream of the future, I still think my life will be better when, but as often as I can I try to remember how good my life is right now. I try to focus on what I have right now. I focus on the smaller picture of each day. Maybe those smaller pictures will add up to the future I dream about and form the bigger picture of someday. But my life won’t be better then if I spend my now wasting it by focusing on things I cannot control. My life will continue to be good then if I focus on what I do now and what I know matters now. 

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