Writer’s block, comparison and social media

Hello writer’s block, how are you? I don’t blame you for visiting me, life is pretty uneventful right now. My creativity is buried underneath my desire for my life to be more interesting. Because really what is interesting about small-town life? My life consists of a lot of worrying and wondering, trying to make plans with no idea where I will be in a month, trying to focus on the things I do have and not on the things I don’t have. So basically, my life is exactly the way life is for everyone else.

I think I have fallen into the trap of comparison which is not hard to do with how prevalent social media is our culture. You cannot go on social media without seeing most people posting the best versions of their lives. Spending time on social media makes it feel like everyone is succeeding in life and I am failing. I encounter this trap every time I go on social media. I caught myself yesterday, I was comparing. Then I took a second look as to what I was comparing my life to. Do I really want my life to be compared to those who post pictures of themselves drinking all the time? I do not.

When I realized I was doing this, I stopped. There is nothing wrong with how anyone else lives their life. Everyone has their own way. I do not need to concern myself with what other people are doing unless I look up to them. This is why I try to only go on social media to look at the people who inspire me. When I go on social media and follow people I look up to, I leave feeling inspired instead of numb. I try not to compare because when I begin to compare I struggle to remember I am looking at people’s best times and comparing them to some of my lowest. It never adds up or works out well, I end up feeling less than.

It is a load of bullshit how we use social media to connect but it really turns into a competition of who is living the best life, doing the coolest things, who looks the happiest because they have “everything.” Maybe your life really is great, maybe it is more good times than bad times, but we all have bad times. We all have hard days and we all make mistakes.

I am not sure social media can ever fully evolve to a place where we are completely honest about our lives and show our true authentic selves. I see people do it and those are the people I go on social media to follow. Because as humans all we really want is to be seen and loved for who we are. We are all looking for love, belonging and connection. Those things don’t come from putting on armor and pretend to be living the best life ever. Love, belonging, and connection come from getting real and letting out true selves be seen.

I make the mistake of comparing sometimes because I am only human. When I stop comparing and I look at my life, I realize how good I have it. There is no reason to feel less than because there is no right way to live my life. The only right way is my way, whatever that means for me. I am glad people are getting married, having babies, getting jobs, and getting drunk because those things make our culture function. Today instead of comparing, I am going to be grateful others have those things because it is proof they exist. It is a reminder that my life is going exactly as it supposed, one next right thing at a time.

So, goodbye writer’s block and thank you for visiting. I know you only come to show me there are plenty of things to write about and I am not digging deep enough. I was blocked because I was trying to understand and write about things I didn’t know or experience for myself by falling into the trap of comparison. Thanks for reminding me I can only write what I know to be true. Also, thanks for reminding me that I just read a book by Brené Brown in which I learned the only way to have love, belonging, and connection in our lives is to be vulnerable.

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